Mea Maxima Culpa

Since this is my first post on Catholic Faith Sharing, I thought I'd write a little about my conversion process.

It would be great to be able to say that I went from unbeliever to fervent Catholic in an instant conversion, like that of St. Paul, but sadly, in many ways, I've been more like St. Augustine.

Born into a nominal Catholic family, I fell into sinful ways and lost my faith around the age of 15. I went on to become a 'Christmas and Easter' communicant a few years later, and strayed further and further from any semblance of a Christian lifestyle. It was only when I fell pregnant at the age of 20, that I began to think about practising again. In fact, I came back into the Church because I wanted my  little child baptised. (You can read more about this here.)

Now, since my story isn't your story, I'll save you from the chronological minutiae of my errors, and instead list my regrets to help those new to the Faith, or struggling to stay faithful.

• I spent too much time reading private revelation: If you know more about some End Times prophecy than you do about the  Holy Eucharist, then put down the locutions and pick up your Catechism! Less 'permanent sign', more 'marks of the Church'! Please don't use your precious, God-given time on something that may not be true, when there is a lifetime of knowledge in the approved Magisterium waiting for you to digest.

• I didn't attend Adoration regularly:  Making a Holy Hour my priority is the best thing I've ever done for my soul. I have it pencilled in every week, but with some flexibility built in, in case something unavoidable crops up. If it's in our calendars, we're much more likely to follow through. And there is no substitute for spending time with the Lord. 

• I didn't try to truly love people: This is how I've learned to love others more: really, really listen to them speak. Talk less, listen more. People really appreciate it when we listen to them. We don't have to have all the answers, we don't always have to give advice. We may not be able to help in any other way, except to listen to them. People first need to know they are loved by God before they can face their sinful ways. Just pray to the Holy Spirit (Simply 'Come, Holy Spirit', if you are short on time) to know how much and what to say. Less is usually more with a first-time encounter. 

• I didn't trust in God with all my heart: How I wish I'd learnt this earlier! In many ways this is the biggest thing, but the other points all lead to it, and they cultivate the trust we need to have in our wonderful Father, Son and Holy Ghost. If only we could learn to trust - there would be so much less anxiety and fear in our lives. (This inexpensive little ebook helped me greatly to learn to trust.)  

• In being afraid of 'judging', I failed to exercise good judgement: Judgment is such a misused term these days, but of course, everyone makes judgements all day long about a multitude of practical things. Christians are routinely accused of judging people, when we are in fact, simply making a judgement about a sinful action. And 'right judgement' is a gift of the Holy Spirit. Let's pray for an increase in this gift.

So there you have my 5 points for a fruitful conversion. 

(I've not included availing oneself of the Sacraments, reciting the Rosary often, wearing the Scapular - these go without saying.)

If you have any more ideas, leave them in the comments below.

Yours in Christ,

Kathy.